(43-314) Be Yourself!

When I wrote "Reel Life Wisdom" I told you about the movie quote directory. Writing a daily blog, I often have to go looking for inspiration, and today I've decided to share a quote that was emailed to me a number of weeks ago.

When I first read this quote I though that it had a lot of merit, but I wasn't prepared to expound upon it at the time. But truth be told, there really isn't much that I should need to say. The quote was from the 2007 movie "Stardust" (which I'll admit I haven't seen.) “Why fight to be accepted by people you don’t actually want to be like?”  I like that!

Even though I'm a big fan of peace and harmony, and the "can't we all just get along" mentality; on a smaller scale I think this quote is something that many of us need to remind ourselves of on a regular basis. Let's expand on it too. I believe that we could go as far as to say, why care what people who you DON'T care about think about you? Be YOURSELF! Like YOURSELF! And let everyone else worry about themselves. Don't try to impress people that you aren't impressed by. YOU are a gift, and you should share your time, your thoughts and your uniqueness with those that you choose. Some people may think that they know you based on something superficial or something that they heard about you, or because of how you conduct yourself at work, at school or in social situations.  But they only know what they perceive of you. And no one is to say that their perception is correct.

I try to be kind, courteous and respectful to everyone, but that is not to say that I want to be "friends" with everyone; and I believe that's OK.  If you think about it, I'm sure that you can name a friend of yours who has another friend that you might not have chosen as your own friend. And that's OK. But should you be worried about what that person thinks about you, if they're not someone that you yourself would want be friends with?  No!

Now let me give this disclaimer, before I get in any trouble. This post is not directed towards anyone that I know. It is merely some thoughts that were triggered by the quote that I shared. These are lessons that I attempt to teach my children, in my efforts to help them express their individuality and build positive self esteem and it is something that I myself need to remember. If there is someone who is disapproving of me, and I don't care for them anyway, then why should it matter, what they think of me? It shouldn't! It doesn't! And I hope that you will remember that too.
Till next time...
Queen of EVERYTHING

                                                                                         

(43-162) WHAT A GIRL!

When it comes to Kelsie, ya never know what you're gonna get; and it's not just because she's seven years old; it's because she's KELSIE!  Kelsie has been a force to be reckoned with since the moment that she was conceived.  She is wise beyond her years, temperamental as the day is long, stubborn, loving, considerate, perceptive, persistent and forthright.  Blah, blah, blah, blah blah.  I could go on and on and list every adjective there is; but for the sake of brevity; YES, brevity; I'll just leave the description at that; so that you can understand that she is unpredictable at best.  The ONLY thing that you can count on with Kels is that you never know how she's going to react or what she's going to do.  When you think something will bother her she shrugs it off; and when you think something isn't a big deal, she can give a world is coming to an end performance, worthy of an Academy award nomination.

Case in point...  Sunday night I decided to make 2 dinners; Chicken Parmigiana and meatballs.  The chicken parm was going to be for Sunday dinner, and the meatballs were going to be for a couple of nights during the week.  Well, several months ago, I taught the girls how to roll the meatballs, so I enlisted their help in doing so; while I prepared the chicken.  The girls had five pounds of meat that they needed to make into meatballs, and I thought that everything was going along fine, until I heard Kelsie say quizzically, "You put meat on my face?"  Lyndzi and I both burst out laughing at the same time; and Kelsie's hysterics immediately ensued.  The more that Lyndzi and I laughed, the louder Kelsie wailed.  I tried to explain that I didn't think that it was funny that Lyndzi had put meat on her face; and in between laughs, I told Lyndzi that she shouldn't have done that.  I tried to explain to Kelsie that I had only laughed because the way that she said "You put meat on my face,"  was so funny.  She didn't seem to care what I had to say.  She was already too invested in her meltdown; so I told her to go to her room to calm down.  After a few minutes, I sent Lyndzi up to apologize, but Kelsie wouldn't hear it.  Shortly thereafter, I tired to talk to her again; but she was just too far gone.  When she finally relented and came downstairs; I asked if she wanted to finish making her meatballs, but she wouldn't answer me.  I calmly asked the same question three times; but when she refused to speak, I took it upon myself to make the remainder of the meatballs.
A few minutes later, as I was cooking, Kelsie came over, still quite teary eyed, and said that she wanted to make the meatballs.  I explained that I had already finished, and that she would have to make them next time, and with that, she jumped up and down a number of times and screamed that she wanted to make the meatballs.  I couldn't believe my eyes. 
Kelsie needed to cool off; literally, so she took her little self out to the backyard and stood there in her misery.  Nicky and Lyndzi went out to join her; and when she felt calm enough, she came in and told me that she had wanted to make the meatballs and she asked if I would flatten some of the meat, so that SHE could make them.  I told her that I was very sorry that she had gotten so upset, but I wasn't going to flatten the meat and give her a chance to make them, after the way that she'd behaved.  She tried to convince me to do it; but I held my ground.  I reminded her that I had asked her three times and she had refused to answer me; and that people who carry on as she had, do not get their way.  She gave me a big hug, and apologized and by dinner time she was back to her calmer self.

When Kelsie got up for school on Monday morning; she was uncustomarily agreeable; so I wondered what was up.  I commented that I liked how cooperative she was being, and she was pleased.  When I picked her up from school, the positive behavior continued; as it did all day Tuesday and Wednesday; and although I didn't want to jinx it, or call attention to it; I was compelled to ask Kelsie about her marvelous mood.  She said that she'd noticed it as well and that she didn't know why she was behaving as nicely as she had been, but she liked it.

Now like I said before, Kelsie can turn out an Academy award winning performance; so when she's all sweetness and light; I do take it with a grain of salt; BUT, she said something to me last night, that just blew my mind and warmed my heart and even though I'm often impressed by Kelsie, this time I was in awe. 
I had told Kelsie that her friend Natalia, could spend the night on Friday night.  Kels asked if she should come home from school with her, and I explained that we might have pedicure appointments, so we should probably pick her up once we were done.  Now, it's important for you to know that Kelsie was going to pay for her own pedicure, with some of the birthday / Christmas money that she'd received and when I pointed out that it wouldn't be fun for Natalia to sit through our pedicures, Kelsie said, "well, I could treat her."  And my heart smiled.  What generosity, what thoughtfulness, what compassion; WHAT A GIRL!  I told Kelsie that I was SO proud of her for suggesting that, but I didn't think that it was necessary; and she was OK with that.

Oh Kelsie is my little roller coaster.  We go up, we go down, we scream at the top of our lungs, and we laugh; and seriously, I wouldn't change a thing.  Kelsie is a feisty little individual; who does as she pleases.  So I guess that it should have come as no surprise, that when we got our pedicures tonight; Kelsie chose two colors, a deep green blue, and a neon pink, and she had Jenny at Pure Elements, use both colors on alternating toes; AND put white polka dots on each toe.  I suggested that she settle on one color; but she knew EXACTLY what she wanted; and since it was her money; I wasn't going to try and change her mind.  In the long run, her toes looked terrific; and they truly represent exactly who she is; an original, a free thinker; MY DAUGHTER!

Till next time...

Queen of EVERYTHING

(43-88) All Made Up?

Today's blog topic was pulled from Mari's,"Memories and Thoughts" jar.  I was looking for something lighthearted, and fun and came across "What color is your nail polish and make-up;"  And I though that footed the bill.  
Now, if you've never met me in person; my answer may sound like something that you'd expect a 16 year old to say; but if you have met me; I think you'll agree that in the long run; it all makes sense.
My fingernails are rarely polished; but my toes always are; and the color that I chose at my last pedicure was a pale aqua.  Yes, I chose the color in honor of the Torpedos; but also because it's funky and different; (just like me.)  I only choose red polish once in a blue moon; because I can rarely find a red polish that goes well with my skin tone. If I was going to do something more traditional, i'd probably pick a pink or an orange; but most often I go with some kind of purple.  I march to my own drum when it comes to my nail polish and I think that everybody should.  If red floats your boat; have it; but if you are more of a green gal; I say wear it loud, wear it proud!

My mom always wore a lot of make-up; in fact, I don't think that any of my friends ever saw her without her make-up; although she wasn't as bad as one condo mom who wouldn't let her kids have friends in the house unless she had "her face" on.  My mom had worked in a cosmetics store before I was born; and even though she never worked as a make-up artist; her make-up application was a work of art.  I recall watching her put her make-up on when I was a little girl; and I couldn't wait to get older so that I could wear make-up too.

When I was 12 and attending my first Bar Mitvah, my mom let me buy some lavender, Aziza eyeshadow; and I remember being so excited.  In Junior high, girl's started using Cover Girl, Nautical blue eyeliner; but Richie Howell wasn't down with that; and he made me wait until high school; to wear make-up.   By the time I started high school and had permission to wear make up; I went all out and looking back, it's very possible that I may have overdid it..  I remember wearing varying shades of purple eyeshadow, blush, eyeliner and mascara; but to my credit, I think that it was applied well; (or believe me; the very, critical Richie Howell, would have let me know about it.)   Since I was a big make-up fan my freshman year;  I jumped at the chance to join the make-up crewfor our spring musical; when my friend Joan had asked me about it.  We were taught how to apply the stage make-up and I really enjoyed it; so the following year when they were looking for a new make-up director, I volunteered, was elected; and stayed in that position for 3 years.  By Christmas time, my Freshman year of college, I actually considering leaving school, to go to cosmetology school instead; but I never went through with it.

I find it interesting that as time has gone by; I've grown accustomed to wearing less and less make-up.  On a daily basis I wear purple or plum eyeliner; because I think it is the most flattering for my green eyes; but that's about it.  If I'm wearing my glasses; which I most often  do; I rarely wear mascara.  But if I put my contacts in; then I'll use mascara for sure.  I only seem to use eyeshadow when I'm going on a date with Luis, or  if there is a reason that I want to look extra special.  I love Urban Decay's palettes with all of it's glitter and sparkle; but they can be a little much; so I frequently combine them with a pale pink, or light brown eyeshadow.  If I apply any kind of foundation, or blush to my face; then I'll use a finishing powder as well; but I can probably count on one hand; the number of times a month that I get dolled up like this.

It's striking to me, how make-up trends vary so, in different times and places.  When I watch my Jersey shows; these ladies have pounds of make-up on; but in Peoria, Arizona I encounter fresh faced women more than those wearing make-up.  Growing up in New City, New York, I would have never gone to the super market with a make-up free face; and now it is less than likely that I'd put on make-up to go out to the store.  Who knows...maybe I wanted to wear make-up to be just like my mom.  She was always so glamorous and beautiful; who wouldn't have wanted to appear that way?  But as  I've gotten older; I've grown to appreciate my attributes, and now when I wear make-up it's worn to enhance what I've got; and not cover it up.
If there's one message that I want to convey; it's be who you are!  Be true to yourself; and do what makes you feel good.  That's what being an individual is all about!!
Till next time...
Queen of EVERYTHING