Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Donkey Land

I've heard it been said that whatever kind of kid you were, you'll probably have a kid whose behavior is like 3 times what yours was - or something like that. So I guess it stands to reason that my son and my older daughter are just about as kind and cooperative as you could be; since fore the most part, I was a very good child. I rarely got into trouble (except for the time that I told my brother that he sucked and then for a punishment I had to go to Levitz furniture store with my parents - agghh torture.) I was a good student, NEVER in trouble at school, so all and all a good kid; and I've been rewarded ten fold, with really awesome children.
Now yes, I do have a third child; she is my BONUS baby. My husband and I conceived my younger daughter while I was nursing and on the pill. I absolutely HATE the expression "oops baby," because she was not an "oops," she was a gift from god that I wasn't planning on, but I adore and my family wouldn't be complete without her. My OB said there was a 1 percent chance that I could have conceived given the pills and the breast feeding factors, so he believes that she is destined for greatness; and I guess that we should have known then what a strong willed little fighter she would be. Let's face it - my younger daughter is a force to be reckoned with.

We have several nicknames for my younger daughter, but the one that epitomizes her true personality is the one that I gave her when she was just about a year old- "Stitch." You know parents, like Lilo and "stitch." Oh she is not always in "Stitch" mode, but when she is, WATCH OUT; she is Stitch personified. I can remember one day in particular when we were at Target, and she took off as many children will (right?) and my children and I were chasing her through the store (she was like one,) and I can still hear my other children's voices calling "Stitch, come back." OMG - I can laugh now, but gosh do I have my hands full.

Anyway, although she can be a little terror, she is also INCREDIBLY smart with the vocabulary of a much older child and the brain of a mad scientist. She can be very defiant, and very loving, very manipulative, and funny as heck - she's 3, what can you expect? But as the mom of 2 other children who never did any of the naughty, crazy things that she does, it also makes it much worse for her because as well behaved as the other 2 are; it magnifies everything that she does, to make her look that much worse. I TOTALLY recognize that but at the time when she is doing something ridiculously mischievous, it's kind of hard to remember - after all, I am the Queen but I am human and I am running out of patience.
Alot of the time I am very frustrated with her and then I get frustrated and angry with myself - she deserves better than that. I've gotten to the point where I really don't know how else to get through to her when she has done something wrong; and then it dawned on me; I need a Donkey land.

When my brother and I were growing up, he was the one always getting in trouble and so one day my parents told him that if he didn't start behaving himself, they were going to call Donkey land to come and get him. No I'm not high; Donkey land - like in Pinocchio when Pinocchio goes to Pleasure Island with that naughty boy and then they are all turned into donkeys, (oh, I hope this sounds familiar or this blog is just going to pot big time.) Anyway, the idea of Donkey land was pretty scary to my brother and I , so all my parents had to say was "should I call Donkey land?" And he would cry and get upset and promise to be good. My parents would even go so far as to pick up the phone and say "Hello Donkey land," as my brother sat on the stairs crying "no, no, I'll be good." To add insult to injury if my memory serves me correctly, I think my brother may have even had Pinocchio sheets on his bed, so the idea of Donkey land was always very prevalent in his mind.

Well, one night, my parents took it a step further and showed us where Donkey land was. They drove behind a small strip mall by our house, and there was a wooded area behind that, and they told us that Donkey land was in there. Woohoo!! - did that do the trick.

Oh Donkey land - just to think about it gives me a good laugh; but now I need a Donkey Land of my own. Something that I can use on my younger daughter so we'll see less Stitch and more of the loving, compassionate, smart, sweet girl that she is. When I figure this one out, I'll let you know. She's been giving me a good run for my money the past few days, but I am the Queen of IMPOSSIBLE SITUATIONS, so I feel confident that I will be working this one out soon. "Hello Donkey land."
Till next time...


Kalka Wife said...

Well as the proud parent of a boy who has spent 75% of his time being perfectly BEASTLY, I can tell you, "Hello, SAnta?" works for about a day. It's a band aid. Donkey Land sounds MUCH scarier and I love the fact that they drove you to it!!! I was laughing so hard iced tea came out my nose. Maybe I will have to invent my own Donkey Land too, or we can join forces and tell our kids together about Donkey land. Only after they watch Pinnochio though...

Navin said...

I didn't realize that the empty lot behind Bradlees was so bad...Geez, if they really wanted to scare you they should have just told you that you can only buy your clothing at Bradlees for a year and were banned from garlic knots for two weeks! Hmmm, I wonder what's behind Target?

The Donkanator said...

Watch out all you bad boys or girls, especially all you boys who like to look at big Vagina's in changing rooms, this is the govanator of Donkey Land, and I will haunt you in your sleep. Trust me Donkey Land is alive and well.