(43-286) A Sad Reminder

I try to be very aware of how precious life is and how unexpectedly it can slip away; and yet, I'm guilty of  spending TOO much time worrying about problems that are insignificant in the big scheme of things.  I strive to be someone who makes the most of each day that I'm given, because I've learned first hand that tomorrow is never promised.  And yet, I still seem to spend a ridiculous amount of time with unnecessary drama; whether I want to or not.  I know that I'm not alone with this, and if I took a poll, I'm sure that at least half of the people would probably say the same; but that just means that we ALL need to reprogram ourselves.

When I got home from the supermarket yesterday, Luis seemed quite solemn.  He told me that he needed to tell me something, and the way that he said it; I got nervous.  He gave me a hug and a kiss, and I asked him what was wrong.  Luis went on to tell me that a couple of police officers had come to his hotel in the morning because they had found a room key that belonged to some guests.  Long story short (REALLY,)  A couple from Alaska, that had been staying at the hotel, had gone out for a walk, and were hit by a car and died instantly.  The driver had fallen asleep at the wheel of his SUV and he hit them both and they were killed immediately.  I cried when he told me, because it seemed so unreal; and yet so possible.  The couple were only in their early fifties; and although they had called the front desk that morning to say that they'd be checking out early, I'm certain that they had no idea how right they were.

My heart broke for their family, who I could only imagine were in shock.  It seemed so incredibly, unfair to me; and yet I KNOW that there are no guarantees.  So this is the lesson that once again I'm trying to teach myself.  And for the benefit of the (say it with me) "Greater Good," I'm sharing with you.

Luis' story is such a sad reminder of how fleeting life can be; but I want to take it to heart.  I want to keep this tragedy and all of the others that I'm aware of, locked up in a tiny compartment in my mind, so that the next time that I'm sweating the small stuff, I can pull it out, and put things into perspective; so that I don't waste another priceless minute.  And I hope that you can do the same.
Till next time...
Queen of EVERYTHING

(43-284) A Day To Remember

Most people seem to have vivid memories of family vacations and holidays; but I also want to remember and rejoice in the importance of the every day.  I want to be able to recall the feelings of spending time with my family and friends when we weren't necessarily doing something special; we were just TOGETHER and enjoying each others company, doing whatever. 

We got an early start this morning.  Well, not THAT early, but maybe a lil earlier than I would have liked.  We took the kids to a rollerskating lesson and I couldn't help but marvel at how far they'd come since the fiasco that was our first skating experience.  Jenny and her kids then met us at ten for open skate; and by 12:15 we went to get some lunch.

Jenny had told us that they were going to a dog expo at Phoenix University Stadium, so we decided to check it out.  Both admission and parking were free, so it was a wonderful way to pass some time.   We had fun seeing the different breeds of dogs; and there was even an agility course, which the kids really got a kick out of.  It was sad to see how many rescued dogs there were up for adoption or fostering.  Yet, it was heart warming to see how many kind hearted, generous, people there were, who were willing to help and care for these animals.

We headed back home and I had some quality snuggle time with Kelsie.  Then Luis, Kelsie and I were off to Sam's Club to buy some burger meat for dinner.  While we stopped to get gas, I called to check on my friend Tina as she'd had a death in her family last night.  Tina said that she was doing much better than she had been the night before; and we discussed  our plans for the rest of the day.  Tina told me that she was going to go swimming and she invited us to join her.  I said that we were on our way to get food to make for dinner, and she welcomed us to grill at her house.  We hurried through Sam's so that we could go to Tina's for an impromptu swim and barbecue; then stopped home quick for Nicky, Lyndzi, swimsuits and towels; and we were on our way.
I love nights like this.  You think that you're not going to be doing anything and then all of a sudden, you are.

I made the burgers, which Luis grilled and they were PERFECT!  Tina supplied all of the drinks and sides, including, this YUMMY Ranch dressing that she made from a Hidden Valley Ranch mix. (see Tina, I mentioned it...)

It's always such a pleasure to spend time with my friend Tina and her daughter Kristin. They are positive, easy going, and loving.  (See Kristin, I mentioned you and I wrote about how great you are just like you told me too, I mean just like you are.) But seriously.  I love Tina AND Kristin; and spending time with them tonight was an unexpected treat.

While I was at Tina's we discussed the fact that I had no idea what I was going to write about today.  We reviewed my day, and agreed that it wasn't necessarily blogworthy.  Not that spending time together wasn't special enough by any means.  I just didn't think that I had a story there.  Once I got home and I got to thinking about it, I realized that not having a story, was my story.  That appreciating the routine, or the day to day was just as important as being grateful for extra special moments; if not more so; because it's all the little pieces of the every day, that make up most of our lives.  The hugs that we receive, the understanding that we share, the appreciation for a good meal; THAT is what life is usually about.  The rest is just gravy.  

In the long run, I went from having an ordinarily, good day to realizing that this really was a day to remember.  A day filled with family, friends and love; and THAT'S what makes life so beautiful!

Till next time...

Queen of EVERYTHING

(43-237) "Reel Life Wisdom"



 When I first got involved with Facebook; I used to post a status everyday.  Sometimes several times a day.  But then I became one of those people who only posted a status when I had something worthwhile or exciting to share; and sometimes I had to go looking for it.  Over the past few months, I've gained some valuable perspective from quotes that I've discovered; while looking for something meaningful to post as my Facebook status, and I even managed to parlay some of the quotes into blogs; as many of you know.  So yesterday, I again went in search of some inspiration.  I didn't really have a specific topic in mind; when I came across "Reel Life Wisdom," The movie quote directory  but it's proven to be an amusing and useful find.

The Reel Life Wisdom site has a multitude of categories to chose quotes from.  They break it down first by SELF, LIFE, LOVE & RANDOM BITS OF WISDOM.  THEN, they disseminate the quotes further, based on additional themes. For instance, under SELF, you may find quotes about Identity vs. Image, Perspective, Purpose, Hope and character; just to name a few.  For LIFE: Choice vs. Destiny, Freedom, Decision making, Achievement and Change.  Under the heading of LOVE you could find quotes about Men, Women, Feelings, Friends, and Sex, amongst others.  And RANDOM BITS OF WISDOM includes such subjects as Adversity, Reality and Truth, Respect, Responsibility, and Regret.  You'll have to check this site out for yourself; because the topics that I've listed are truly, only the tip of the iceberg.  They even offer teacher/parent tools so that movie quotes may be used to generate meaningful conversations with kids about self-management.

When I chose to write about "Reel Life Wisdom,"  I decided that I'd pick a topic and  share some of  the quotes that made an impact on me.  So, in the interest of,  (say it with me,) "The GREATER Good;" it should come as no surprise, that I've selected movie quotes about  MEANINGFUL LIVING...

“If you listen real close, you can hear them whisper their legacy to you. Go on, lean in. Listen, you hear it? Carpe diem, seize the day boys, make your lives extraordinary.”
"Dead Poets Society" 1989

“Life is too short to be wondering, ‘What if?’” 
 "Paper Heart"  2009

“Take part. Contribute. Be interested in everything and everybody.”
"Now Voyager"  1942

“The effort must be total for the results to be meaningful.”
"Wit"  2001

“If you’re not excited by it, why do you do it?” 
 "Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian"   2009

“For what it’s worth, it’s never too late to be whoever you want to be."
"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"  2008

"I don’t want to survive, I want to live!"
"WALL-E"  2008

Till next time...
Queen of EVERYTHING

(43-103) Nothing Much

Just a typical Sunday here at the Ramos household.  I slept in till 8, (well, that's sleeping in for me, since I'm up for work at 445.)  I had coffee, looked through the supermarket flyers, made a grocery list (which of course I left home when I went to the store.)  I did three loads of laundry and loaded the dishwasher; and in the process I got a terrible spasm in my back.  What the heck?  Thankfully I've never had back problems; but this spasm was a doozie!!  I get spasms in my calves from time to time, but usually when I'm sleeping; but to get this out of the blue back spasm; now THAT was unexpected.

Because I'm a trooper, with a high tolerance for pain; I toughed it out and took the girls to Kohl's.  We got a couple of great deals for them; went home for lunch, and then Lyndzi and I headed to our second Kohl's of the day, because there was a shirt that she was after but they didn't have her size at our first store; AND I needed to get a pair of pants for Kels and they were out of her size at the first store too.

I came home, folded some laundry; and then Luis and I went to Fry's.  I got some more great deals, used the Albertson's $10 off a $100 purchase coupon, and then they had a $10 coupon of their own that I didn't know about, but my checker applied.  I stocked up on toothpaste, butter and water; which brought me an additional savings.  And for anyone who's interested; they do have Capri Sun on sale again for $1.49   When all was said and done, I had saved about $76 dollars; Luis was quite impressed, and so I was doubly happy.

Yup, just pretty run of the mill here for me; but sometimes run of the mill is OK.  I'd take run of the mill over drama ANY DAY.  To me, if you have a day when nothing goes wrong; then it's a good day.  I remember a couple of months after I'd gotten married and we were living in Orlando; I was talking to a friend who was  single and living in New York.  My friend asked what was new; I said "nothing much," and she seemed very disappointed.  I explained that nothing being new was definitely better than something being wrong.  We spoke a lot less frequently after this and our conversations were very different because I didn't have stories of going out and meeting people like she did; but I had happiness and contentment, which was all I ever wanted. 

I have to laugh at the "kids" that I see who are in such a rush to grow up.  They want to accelerate everything in their life; and I want to say "would you like to pay my credit card bill, because here's where growing up gets ya."  And of course I remember how it was as a kid and you fantasized about having a boyfriend, or a husband and a house of your own; and now I'm here; and really it is great; but so were the other parts of my life too.  I loved high school, had a great time in college and my early twenties were a blast; but I think that it's all of these experiences accumulated together that allow me to enjoy and treasure exactly where I am now; having a run of the mill, nothing exciting to report Sunday.  If you rush through all of your experiences, then you'll never be able to appreciate your life..  So my advice to everyone who's in a rush is; stop and smell the roses.  Take the good with the bad, and know that in the long run, each experience is going to make you who you are.  If I'd never had a bad relationship with a boyfriend or a friend; then I wouldn't be able to appreciate how blessed I am to have the husband that I do; or the friends that I cherish.  Here's another big lesson; NOT everyone is for EVERYONE.  Find friends who are like you and remember that quality is a lot more important than quantity; in every aspect of your life.  OK, not quite sure how I got on this soapbox, and I think that it's time for me to get down.  I wish you a peaceful week, with nothing much going on.                                                   

Till next time...

Queen of EVERYTHING                    

(43-79) My Messages...

I am REALLY looking forward to this weekend.  Friday is date day with Luis, and I'm going to make homemade meatballs and spaghetti for dinner; which is a welcome meal on SO many levels.  First of all it's one of my family's, fave dinners and secondly, I feel like I haven't cooked all week.
Saturday is opening day for our soccer season; and I can't wait to cheer on Luis, Kelsie and the Torpedos, Lyndzi and TNT, and Nicky and Little United.  All 3 kids are raring to go; and I just LOVE to watch them play.  As if all of these plans weren't enough; late Saturday afternoon, I'm going to go to a scrapbooking crop at my friend Mari's and attempt to get some layouts done.

When I was driving to my office this morning; I had two thoughts on my mind.  Well, 3 if you count the bagel that I was contemplating.  I was trying to decide what I might blog about today, and thinking about possible scrapbook layouts for Saturday.  I was listening to the radio and "Just The Way You Are" by Bruno Mars came on.  I LOVE the theme of this tune; and even though it's really a love song from a man to a woman; it made me think of my daughters and how I feel about them.  Right then and there, something clicked; and I knew that I needed to make a layout for each of my girls, using the lyrics from this song.   In this time of chronic bullying, and children conforming to fit in; I want all of my children to know that they ARE "amazing; just the way" they are.  I want them to believe that their smiles light up the room, and that they're the most perfect them that they can be.
 
There have been two other times, that I've considered using song lyrics in scrapbook layouts.  I'm sure that I'm not the first scrapbooker who's wanted to use the lyrics to Lee Ann Womack's "I Hope You Dance."   The words of encouragement and bravery are ones that I want to instill in my children.  I want them to take advantage of EVERY opportunity, choose positivity and love life to the fullest.

The first time that I heard "My Wish" by Rascal Flatts; I actually cried.  The message was so poignant, that it moved me to tears.  And now in my 43rd year, more than ever; the lyrics of this song could be my anthem. 
Till next time...
Queen of EVERYTHING

(43-10) Acceptance

It's just after 1PM, and I've already had a mind expanding day.  I've learned some very valuable lessons, and although they have not been pleasant; they were necessary!    Even though I've never personally been in a 12 step program of any type; I am finding comfort in the words of the serenity prayer "God, grant me the serenity To accept the things I cannot change; Courage to change the things I can; And wisdom to know the difference."  I now understand that even though you're being a good friend if you want more for your friend than they want for themself;  a circumstance like this is a waste of your time and energy.  I've been reminded that when someone shows you who they are; you should believe them AND that if someone REPEATEDLY does the same things, even though they say they want to do things differently; they are NEVER going to change; despite your good intentions and repeated offers of help.  It makes me sad to say that I've learned these lessons today; but at the same time, it gives me clarity about how I should proceed in the future.
In the interest of preserving this person's privacy (and you need to read that word with an English accent and a short i because it just sounds so much better to me that way;)  I know that these statements must sound very vague; but the truth is that you don't really need to know all of the details of what brought me to these realizations, in order to benefit from them; which is of course why I've shared what I have. 
In order to be the best people that we can be, we must grow from both our positive and negative experiences.  We must continue to keep learning about who we are, what we need and what our limitations are when it comes to being there for ourselves and for others.  As for me, I surprisingly feel a great sense of peace and relief; and I'm making a list of the friends that I need to give great big hugs to when I see them.
Till next time...
Queen of EVERYTHING