Friday, August 6, 2010

(43-10) Acceptance

It's just after 1PM, and I've already had a mind expanding day.  I've learned some very valuable lessons, and although they have not been pleasant; they were necessary!    Even though I've never personally been in a 12 step program of any type; I am finding comfort in the words of the serenity prayer "God, grant me the serenity To accept the things I cannot change; Courage to change the things I can; And wisdom to know the difference."  I now understand that even though you're being a good friend if you want more for your friend than they want for themself;  a circumstance like this is a waste of your time and energy.  I've been reminded that when someone shows you who they are; you should believe them AND that if someone REPEATEDLY does the same things, even though they say they want to do things differently; they are NEVER going to change; despite your good intentions and repeated offers of help.  It makes me sad to say that I've learned these lessons today; but at the same time, it gives me clarity about how I should proceed in the future.
In the interest of preserving this person's privacy (and you need to read that word with an English accent and a short i because it just sounds so much better to me that way;)  I know that these statements must sound very vague; but the truth is that you don't really need to know all of the details of what brought me to these realizations, in order to benefit from them; which is of course why I've shared what I have. 
In order to be the best people that we can be, we must grow from both our positive and negative experiences.  We must continue to keep learning about who we are, what we need and what our limitations are when it comes to being there for ourselves and for others.  As for me, I surprisingly feel a great sense of peace and relief; and I'm making a list of the friends that I need to give great big hugs to when I see them.
Till next time...
Queen of EVERYTHING

2 comments:

Julie Tucker-Wolek said...

very powerful paige...and ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh so true! :):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)

Unknown said...

Some of life's lessons, though valuable, are so painful. I am so sorry you had to learn this right now after opening your heart to people. You are an amazing friend and I am blessed to have you in my life. Too bad for those who are too messed up to "get it." Thank you for my great big hug too BTW!